The sermon Sunday was on Diligence. My mom had come to visit us for the weekend and was sitting beside me, that was lovely. I've haven't been able to hear a sermon or worship for a month. It felt so good to sit by my mom and worship. Sometimes I struggle with messages like "diligence" though. This one was delivered without guilt but I found myself thinking over and over,
"Am I diligent enough?". "What have I finished in my life anyway?"
I didn't feel like I was finishing anything well as a housekeeper, and with children's ministry, or any work I do. I tried to get off my merry go round of guilt and ask God
"What do you think? Am I at all diligent?"
I felt like I heard a "Well done" so I stepped away from the circling accusing thoughts and tried to put my mind at rest.
The next day Dorathea was working on writing schoolwork. She was supposed to copy a long sentence from the book she was reading, "The Adventures of Jimmy Skunk". Dorathea's had a great attitude about second grade this year.
Until yesterday, when she had an emotional meltdown. After some bad behavior and consequences (I'll spare you the emotional details ) I prayed for her and asked
"Should I discipline her? How can I get her through the lesson?"
God said
"Just listen to her."
So I listened the way God listens to me. I called her to sit close to me and tell me what was wrong. She lay her head on my lap and poured her little heart out.
"Mommy I had that jumping spider toy to help make copywork fun before. (she had invented a game with a novelty toy that popped up to see how many letters she could write before it popped.)
"I miss that spider!
I don't know how to make this fun.
It's just too hard and I'll never finish!"
I thought about giving her a normal adult answer that work isn't always going to be fun as I frown down at her.
I told her about the sermon and said that
"God wants you to persevere in tough situations like that."
"But I don't know hoo-ow" she replied. So we brainstormed about ways to make it through the assignment and I finally said,
"How about we make it a game by giving you a jellybean for each word you get right?"
This was greeted with a big smile and a nod. Off she went to finish the assignment happily enjoying the jelly bean game with no more prodding needed.
I've been in need of jelly beans to get me through a season that feels hopeless. Many times I don't see an end to the seemingly impossible finances, housework, and long lists of failures that stretch in front of me like that long sentence did in front of D. That's why God gives me jellybeans.
Since yesterday I've been looking for them.
These gorgeous yellow leaves that are full of fleeting joy. Yellow Jellybean
A friend I reach out to when I am feeling hopeless who puts her arm around me and with a few words lets me know I'm valued and that she is behind me. a big Jellybean
Yesterday when Dorathea put her head on my lap and I could (by the Grace of God) help her solve the problem. a pink jellybean
Last night driving home We saw an orange crescent moon, and then fireworks as we pulled into our town. We stopped the car and watched, windows open, fall air pouring in, watching them light up the dark sky. Jelly bean
With each jelly bean I'm now hearing, "Good job. Keep going. I'm proud of you. I love you so much I'm giving you this one sweet moment."
D- "Come on Jonathan! We can perservere!"
J- "Yeah Siser! We perservere! We not give up. We can do it!"
Those people who listen to me, and then cheer me on, they are my favorite jelly bean.
Actually I don't like jelly beans, those were for Dorathea.
I like coffee
When I pour out my heart to God and tune my ears to listen to His voice, thats a warm, sweet cup of espresso.
"Am I diligent enough?". "What have I finished in my life anyway?"
I didn't feel like I was finishing anything well as a housekeeper, and with children's ministry, or any work I do. I tried to get off my merry go round of guilt and ask God
"What do you think? Am I at all diligent?"
I felt like I heard a "Well done" so I stepped away from the circling accusing thoughts and tried to put my mind at rest.
The next day Dorathea was working on writing schoolwork. She was supposed to copy a long sentence from the book she was reading, "The Adventures of Jimmy Skunk". Dorathea's had a great attitude about second grade this year.
Until yesterday, when she had an emotional meltdown. After some bad behavior and consequences (I'll spare you the emotional details ) I prayed for her and asked
"Should I discipline her? How can I get her through the lesson?"
God said
"Just listen to her."
So I listened the way God listens to me. I called her to sit close to me and tell me what was wrong. She lay her head on my lap and poured her little heart out.
"Mommy I had that jumping spider toy to help make copywork fun before. (she had invented a game with a novelty toy that popped up to see how many letters she could write before it popped.)
"I miss that spider!
I don't know how to make this fun.
It's just too hard and I'll never finish!"
I thought about giving her a normal adult answer that work isn't always going to be fun as I frown down at her.
I told her about the sermon and said that
"God wants you to persevere in tough situations like that."
"But I don't know hoo-ow" she replied. So we brainstormed about ways to make it through the assignment and I finally said,
"How about we make it a game by giving you a jellybean for each word you get right?"
This was greeted with a big smile and a nod. Off she went to finish the assignment happily enjoying the jelly bean game with no more prodding needed.
I've been in need of jelly beans to get me through a season that feels hopeless. Many times I don't see an end to the seemingly impossible finances, housework, and long lists of failures that stretch in front of me like that long sentence did in front of D. That's why God gives me jellybeans.
Since yesterday I've been looking for them.
A friend I reach out to when I am feeling hopeless who puts her arm around me and with a few words lets me know I'm valued and that she is behind me. a big Jellybean
Yesterday when Dorathea put her head on my lap and I could (by the Grace of God) help her solve the problem. a pink jellybean
Last night driving home We saw an orange crescent moon, and then fireworks as we pulled into our town. We stopped the car and watched, windows open, fall air pouring in, watching them light up the dark sky. Jelly bean
With each jelly bean I'm now hearing, "Good job. Keep going. I'm proud of you. I love you so much I'm giving you this one sweet moment."
"Taste and see that the Lord is Good!Today I overheard this conversation between Dorathea and Jonathan;
Blessed is the one who takes refuge in Him!" Psalm 34:8
D- "Come on Jonathan! We can perservere!"
J- "Yeah Siser! We perservere! We not give up. We can do it!"
Those people who listen to me, and then cheer me on, they are my favorite jelly bean.
Actually I don't like jelly beans, those were for Dorathea.
I like coffee
When I pour out my heart to God and tune my ears to listen to His voice, thats a warm, sweet cup of espresso.
"I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me.
He freed me from all my fears.
Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy;
no shadow of shame will darken their faces.
In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened;
he saved me from all my troubles.
For the angel of the Lord is a guard;
he surrounds and defends all who fear him.
Taste and see that the Lord is good.
Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in him!" Psalm 34 verses 4-8
